I've hurt another bereaved mother's feelings by saying I had my doubts about a medium we had seen together. There were thirty people in the room. I didn't go as a true believer, but rather wanted to support two other mothers who had seen this psychic before and wanted me to experience the wonders that they had seen.
The psychic, TJ, said he would go into a trance and call out the initials of the departed ones who wanted to contact us in the room. His first call-out was from a "young woman whose name starts with C." There was a reference to music, and darkness, and a terrible, accidental death. He felt something around her neck and throat... upper respiratory... and she was not sick. It was a sudden death. He said she knew her mother was trying to find out what happened during the last moments she was alive, and she wanted to tell her mother that she did not suffer... and she was not suffering now.
So, you can imagine, I felt this was all about Chelsea. Later, as TJ was telling a man his son wanted him to start writing down his feelings and keep a journal, the psychic threw up his hands and asked, "Who's Chelsea?" No initials this time. I said, "She's my daughter." TJ said she insists I should continue writing. It could be a book or a movie, and she knows I stopped, but she wants me to start up again. He said she will be with me and help me write. It may not be what I initially intended to write, but that's because she will be writing it, too. Then TJ said, "Didn't I already speak with you?" I said yes, and he moved on.
Later, as TJ was speaking to a man directly in front of me, and the man said he could feel his father's presence when he was among trees, TJ asked, "Didn't you plant a tree in her honor?" The man was talking about a man, not a "her." I silently told Chelsea that I couldn't talk to her right then, but that she should contact me later. After all, 29 other people were waiting for their turn with this psychic.
That was then. That very night I received an email from TJ's office saying I could book a 15 minute consultation for $75 dollars... in IN FOUR MONTHS! He was completely booked up until then. And nearly every day that has followed, I've received an email about a group seance for $350, or a workshop for $150, or $500 for this, or $250 for that and I am fed up! Am I the only person who wonders if his staff is looking up names submitted on credit card registrations, and supplying the man with information? Chelsea's death was well-documented. All of the 36 young people who died had "smoke inhalation" on their death certificates. Music figured heavily in their deaths. Saying she didn't suffer would be exactly what any mother whose daughter had died in a horrific fire would want to hear. Plus, I had written extensively about Chelsea on Face Book at first, but had pretty much stopped by June... only including a piece on each "month" anniversary of her death. Even the tree-planting had been publicized. So, when I mentioned my doubts in our Friday Grief Group, one of the mothers was shocked that I could doubt the veracity of TJ's insight. She was shaken and hurt. After all, I questioned whether I had heard from Chelsea, which meant I questioned whether she had heard from her son. Man, I hate this whole thing! I can't be honest anywhere! I thought that was the only place I could speak from my heart, and now I can't even say what I'm feeling amongst the only people I thought would fully understand... other bereaved mothers. I am looking out at the world... alone.
The psychic, TJ, said he would go into a trance and call out the initials of the departed ones who wanted to contact us in the room. His first call-out was from a "young woman whose name starts with C." There was a reference to music, and darkness, and a terrible, accidental death. He felt something around her neck and throat... upper respiratory... and she was not sick. It was a sudden death. He said she knew her mother was trying to find out what happened during the last moments she was alive, and she wanted to tell her mother that she did not suffer... and she was not suffering now.
So, you can imagine, I felt this was all about Chelsea. Later, as TJ was telling a man his son wanted him to start writing down his feelings and keep a journal, the psychic threw up his hands and asked, "Who's Chelsea?" No initials this time. I said, "She's my daughter." TJ said she insists I should continue writing. It could be a book or a movie, and she knows I stopped, but she wants me to start up again. He said she will be with me and help me write. It may not be what I initially intended to write, but that's because she will be writing it, too. Then TJ said, "Didn't I already speak with you?" I said yes, and he moved on.
Later, as TJ was speaking to a man directly in front of me, and the man said he could feel his father's presence when he was among trees, TJ asked, "Didn't you plant a tree in her honor?" The man was talking about a man, not a "her." I silently told Chelsea that I couldn't talk to her right then, but that she should contact me later. After all, 29 other people were waiting for their turn with this psychic.
That was then. That very night I received an email from TJ's office saying I could book a 15 minute consultation for $75 dollars... in IN FOUR MONTHS! He was completely booked up until then. And nearly every day that has followed, I've received an email about a group seance for $350, or a workshop for $150, or $500 for this, or $250 for that and I am fed up! Am I the only person who wonders if his staff is looking up names submitted on credit card registrations, and supplying the man with information? Chelsea's death was well-documented. All of the 36 young people who died had "smoke inhalation" on their death certificates. Music figured heavily in their deaths. Saying she didn't suffer would be exactly what any mother whose daughter had died in a horrific fire would want to hear. Plus, I had written extensively about Chelsea on Face Book at first, but had pretty much stopped by June... only including a piece on each "month" anniversary of her death. Even the tree-planting had been publicized. So, when I mentioned my doubts in our Friday Grief Group, one of the mothers was shocked that I could doubt the veracity of TJ's insight. She was shaken and hurt. After all, I questioned whether I had heard from Chelsea, which meant I questioned whether she had heard from her son. Man, I hate this whole thing! I can't be honest anywhere! I thought that was the only place I could speak from my heart, and now I can't even say what I'm feeling amongst the only people I thought would fully understand... other bereaved mothers. I am looking out at the world... alone.
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