Years ago, I read in Gloria Steinem's book Revolution From Within, that she did not originate the 1960's feminist statement "Become the man you want to marry." I had adopted that line as my own for years, always giving her credit. I still owe much of my thinking on the subject of equal rights to Ms. Steinem, and continue to value this solid, but anonymous advice. So in that vein, I present the qualities I would admire in a good man... the man I would "marry." He is:
Financially Sound
Well groomed and fit
Relaxed
Intelligent
Accomplished
Capable
Talented
Enjoys travel
Loves me
Respects me
Loves himself
Respects himself
Emotionally generous
Likes my daughters
Conversational
Committed
Kind in every way
I will strive everyday to incorporate these qualities into my own life and become that marriageable man. If I should ever meet my match, even at this late date, he will be welcomed to sit side by side with another complete human being. No more of this "you complete me" soul mate, twin-flame nonsense. I want to be a whole being. My ideal "mate" would want the same thing. Relationship is a dance, not a puzzle yet to be completed. And if one is not in relationship with another person, then nothing is lost and a wholesome, fulfilling life is still the benefit.
I've said it before; the purpose of life is to make each day feel good. Good is a trifling word, so to more explicitly define it, a Good Day is one filled with purpose and love. This is an individual thing. We, as complete human beings, must learn and grow to our own capacity. And our experiences cannot be some lilting stream of silly smiles and empty euphemisms. Our flaws and depths accentuate our individuality, and thus, our beauty. Some days are sad, but meaningful. Other days are giddy, but the joy lifts us to new planes. And the majority of our days are of the Mama Bear variety, middle-of-the-road just right. As they say, “it’s all good,” if one finds it to be so, or finds a way to appreciate the learning experience that makes it so. Okay, so I'm not a store greeter, waving to strangers, and wishing folks a sloppy, happy-faced "Have a good day!" sentimentality. That slogan isn't exactly evil, but it can reek of Hallmark banality, robbing universal love of its power or providing unwanted contrast (and attention) to a darker thought or moment. No, my Good Day builds on an unfolding and evolving understanding of universal truth and beauty. It can never be fully comprehended, but it can be approached. Perhaps I need to find another expression that states my intentional message of goodwill. Well, for now - "Hey all you beautiful, fully-realized humans, have a Universal Truth and Beauty kind of day!" Hmmmm. See you tomorrow. ~ Colleen
Financially Sound
Well groomed and fit
Relaxed
Intelligent
Accomplished
Capable
Talented
Enjoys travel
Loves me
Respects me
Loves himself
Respects himself
Emotionally generous
Likes my daughters
Conversational
Committed
Kind in every way
I will strive everyday to incorporate these qualities into my own life and become that marriageable man. If I should ever meet my match, even at this late date, he will be welcomed to sit side by side with another complete human being. No more of this "you complete me" soul mate, twin-flame nonsense. I want to be a whole being. My ideal "mate" would want the same thing. Relationship is a dance, not a puzzle yet to be completed. And if one is not in relationship with another person, then nothing is lost and a wholesome, fulfilling life is still the benefit.
I've said it before; the purpose of life is to make each day feel good. Good is a trifling word, so to more explicitly define it, a Good Day is one filled with purpose and love. This is an individual thing. We, as complete human beings, must learn and grow to our own capacity. And our experiences cannot be some lilting stream of silly smiles and empty euphemisms. Our flaws and depths accentuate our individuality, and thus, our beauty. Some days are sad, but meaningful. Other days are giddy, but the joy lifts us to new planes. And the majority of our days are of the Mama Bear variety, middle-of-the-road just right. As they say, “it’s all good,” if one finds it to be so, or finds a way to appreciate the learning experience that makes it so. Okay, so I'm not a store greeter, waving to strangers, and wishing folks a sloppy, happy-faced "Have a good day!" sentimentality. That slogan isn't exactly evil, but it can reek of Hallmark banality, robbing universal love of its power or providing unwanted contrast (and attention) to a darker thought or moment. No, my Good Day builds on an unfolding and evolving understanding of universal truth and beauty. It can never be fully comprehended, but it can be approached. Perhaps I need to find another expression that states my intentional message of goodwill. Well, for now - "Hey all you beautiful, fully-realized humans, have a Universal Truth and Beauty kind of day!" Hmmmm. See you tomorrow. ~ Colleen
RSS Feed